Ways My Life Changed Post-Baby That I Expected:

• No sleep
• Rarely bathe
• Think daily about getting a mom haircut

Unexpected Ways My Life Changed Post-Baby:

• Numb gut from surgery
• Have to run the dishwasher every day
• Developed a taste for Gerber Puffs

And the saddest one of all:

• Too tired to read

I used to love staying up late into the night devouring a book.

Now I’m lucky if I can make it through ten pages a night, and eight of those pages are ones I’ve had to re-read because I’ve forgotten major plot points and characters (who’s this Mr. Darcy they keep mentioning? Ah well. Probably not that important).

I’ve come to terms with it, mostly. I’ve retired from the epic reads.

I had to put away War and Peace (just so much war and so much peace, you know? It’s a little much).

Shelved Paradise Lost. Wait… not Paradise Lost. I mean Murder in Paradise. The Sweet Valley High Super Thriller #6 where Jessica and Elizabeth’s mom, Alice, wins a trip to a fancy spa but unfortunately it turns out to be a set-up because someone wants to steal her face (ugh hate when that happens).

Great book. But had to shelve it. Just too heavy for me right now.

My new reading material has to be something fast. Something light. But something that packs a punch. I still want to be thrilled. I’m still me, after all.

When I asked my mom friends for recommendations, the one title that kept coming up was Nina Laden’s Peek-a WHO? 

After I read it, I understood why. Peek-a WOW!

Peek-a WHO? is like Gone Girl lite. It’s your classic whodunit kind of story, complete with twists and turns, red herrings and a chilling ending that you will not see coming.

It’s written in a sparse manner, allowing the reader to fill in the blanks (and not have to remember any unnecessary character names—score!). There’s not a lot of character development or back-story—you’re immediately placed right into the action. You hit the ground running, so be ready.

WARNING: SPOILER ALERTS

From what I understood, the basic premise of Peek-a WHO? is that there has been a murder.

We are not entirely sure of who has been murdered or why or in what manner (death by bludgeon, I surmised), but we have been presented with a list of suspects and evidence, from which we must glean information and piece together the puzzle.

THE SUSPECTS OF PEEK-A WHO? 

(Note: actual suspects from the book not pictured. These are my approximations.)

Was it…

 

 

“Peek a MOO!”
THE COW

What can we tell about the cow?

Standing idly in a patch of grass, looking innocently wide-eyed and content. But perhaps a little too wide-eyed. Flecks of dirt and mud decorate the cow’s black and white body, leaving the white parts stained. Tainted. Where did the mud come from? The patch of grass appears firm, with packed soil. A cow grazing in this field would not have been splattered with mud.

And upon closer inspection, the cow’s udders appear full. Un-milked. The pink teats hang down, heavy, drooping. Why would this be, unless someone missed her morning milking session?

Cow probably wandered off into a different pasture and had a nap, you say.

Could be. But it could also be false.

Had a cow ever committed murder before? I wasn’t sure, but I had to investigate every suspect. Especially those without an alibi for the milking hours of 10-11AM.

I decided I would give Cow the benefit of the doubt for now, but something wasn’t sitting right.

“Peek a BOO!”
THE GHOST

Things just got interesting.

Here, Laden brings in the idea of the supernatural—do you believe in ghosts? In paranormal forces of evil? Did a spirit or apparition commit this murder?

The ghost pictured is an ominous sight, indeed. Bright green. Traditional ghost shape. Bulging eyes. No nose. Bit full in the hips (I hear ya, buddy).

I must admit that I instantly dismissed the idea of supernatural forces having anything to do with this case. I don’t believe in ghosts or ghouls, after all.

But the longer I stared at that lime green ghost, the more shaken I felt. I am a little superstitious, after all.

Do I avoid opening my umbrella inside? I do.

Do I believe that breaking a mirror will give me seven years of bad luck? Maybe.

Do I knock on wood? Sometimes.

Do I spend long periods of time searching for a four-leaf clover whenever I happen to be in a large field or pasture? Absolutely.

Do I make a wish on shooting stars, dandelions and birthday candles? Frequently.

Did I try my hardest to avoid seeing a chimney sweeper on the day of my wedding? You bet your ass I did.

All of these thoughts swirled round and round in my head. Perhaps I shouldn’t be so quick to dismiss the idea of supernatural forces.

The Ghost replaced Cow as the prime suspect.

“Peek a ZOO!”
THE ZOO

Oh, sure, you could easily pin it on the menagerie of wild animals. They make sense.

I could instantly come up with at least ten theories on who could have done it in this group—squeezed by the boa constrictor. Mauled by the jaguar. Crushed by the elephant. Pecked by the peacock. The penguin looks cute but I’m sure he could kill. Not sure about the toucan.

But it’s too easy. Too obvious. They were there for distraction purposes only, to dissuade me from finding the real criminal. But I wasn’t going to be taken in by their dazzling feathers and spots and stripes. Nope.

If I’ve learned anything from watching several true crime documentaries on Netflix, it’s that things are never what they seem. And that the police might sometimes plant evidence if they don’t like you or your family. And that if beets are missing from your farm, it is most likely Mose in socks (that MAY be from an episode of The Office and not necessarily a true crime documentary, but I think the idea still applies).

I quickly dismissed the zoo animals as possible suspects. They weren’t fooling me. Plus, they all had alibis because they live in cages at the zoo.

“Peek a CHOO-CHOO!”
THE TRAIN CONDUCTOR

I stared at the surveillance picture of the train conductor driving the train on his tracks. It was hard to get a good look at him inside that tiny window. I could make out a stoic face. Dark, narrowed eyes. Mouth set in a grim line. A rather nice blue hat.

Round and round he went on those tracks. Unrelentingly. Insistently. Almost maniacally. But WHY? Why would he not stop? What was he running from, exactly?

He pulled behind him eight freights. You could store a lot of things in those freights. Barrels. Logs. Hay. Coal. Foodstuffs. Sleepwear. A dead body? EIGHT DEAD BODIES? Almost certainly.

It was hard for me to get a good read on this suspect. I wished he would just be still, just for a moment, so I could get a closer look or try to inspect those freights. But he wouldn’t. He just kept driving.

They say that guilt can drive a man wild, I mused. Could it not cause a train conductor to just drive?

I decided to let myself sit with that thought for awhile.

“Peek a YOU!”
THE BEAST

I turned the page and found myself face to face with a monster.

I gasped out loud and recoiled. It was far too gruesome a sight to bear. Surely this gargoyle was our culprit.

CASE CLOSED.

But wait, I told myself. Remember your due diligence.

I forced myself to gaze into the beast’s face. I stared into its red, bloodshot eyes and at the dark, almost black half moon circles underneath them. Gazed at the sallow skin and unruly eyebrows. Studied the stringy, greasy hair lying in limp strands. Grimaced at the sight of its stained clothing.  Had this fiend no pride?

But wait…something had caught my eye. Was that a bright blue hair tie? A bright blue hair tie from the Dollar Store? A bright blue hair tie from the Dollar Store like the one I was wearing at that exact moment?

My mouth fell open and I watched in shock as the creature’s did as well.

I was the beast.

Wow. Nina Laden’s done it again, folks. What a twist!

As I gazed into that little mirror, I fell into a deep reflection. Don’t we all have a little bit of monster in us? An animal side? A part that can be savage and wild? Are we capable of terrible things? Can you ever truly know a person? And why hadn’t I washed my hair in what appeared to be months?

Between my mind racing and the baby waking every two hours, I could barely sleep that night. And when I woke up my husband at 4AM and whispered to him, “Are human beings inherently evil?” he was of no help at all.

As I lay in bed watching the sun rise, I knew I had cracked the case.

Peek-a WHO? Laden asks us, to which I answer, Peek-a ALL OF US. Peek-a MANKIND. For we are all guilty of something, aren’t we?

But in this particular case, it was the Cow.

To those of you searching for a thriller that will get your heart racing, look no further than Peek-a WHO? It’s dark. It’s gritty. Light enough to throw into your purse to read on the go, but hefty enough to really sink your teeth into (both literally and figuratively!).

It keeps you guessing at every turn of the page (which would be eleven. There are eleven pages), and best of all, you can finish it in a single evening (okay, maybe two). A perfect book for busy and tired parents who still crave a little excitement.

Hey, hold on a minute, you say from your desk at work, idly wondering why all of your socks have holes in them. You loved this book. Why did you STOP reading Peek-a WHO then?

I know; what’s with all the holes?! Weird. But the main reason that I stopped reading Peek-a WHO? was that I finished it. Had it kept going to 12, 13, even 14 pages, I would have continued. Probably not 15, though. There are only so many things that can rhyme with WHO, you know?

Oh, who am I kidding. I love this book. Peek-a STEW? Bring it on!

Are there any fellow Peek-a WHO? fans out there in the crowd?

What thriller is rocking your world lately? (I have heard that Hippos Go Berserk! is quite chilling but I haven’t yet read it—I scare too easily!) Have you had to alter your reading habits since becoming a parent? What flavor of Gerber Puffs is your favorite?

Mother Haggard wants to know!

PS—I would absolutely not be surprised if they made a movie based off of this book. Tough to say who the dream cast would be, but I think that Liam Neeson would be an excellent train conductor. Thoughts?